there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I thinking of taking all of the pics of his dick that he's sent me and making a calendar.
On the bright side, nobody died. Please bring me back my left shoe. I have work in an hour.
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
Where are you? I hear fireworks and you've gone missing. I'm sure that is not coincidence.
PS- I just ordered a two man zebra costume. Would you like to be my back end?
He called us the '3 Amigos' and told us if hos ex wife came we had to jump the porch railing and hide in the bushes.
Because making bad decisions is what makes our house great and I don't plan on changing that anytime soon.
Have fun in Vegas! Be safe, use condoms, and take a pic of Jon beforehand to give out when he goes missing. It will help the police.
On a scale of 1 to 10 how concerned should I be
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
I need an office. I have big plans. I'm learning spanish this month.
When I finally came to, I was in the DJ booth wearing his headphones while he was spinning. That's all I got.
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
Who put the toilet in the living room? This is extremely inconvenient right now.
Randomize
