So I used to make fun of texas a lot, then I got here and I found a place where I could get my tequila in a to go cup with a straw and I realized that this is the only place I ever want to be
you'll be glad to know I got kicked off the microphone at a bar in Breckenridge last night thanks to my country rendition of all star
Just threw up at the bar from the heat. Fun change of pace.
You were throwing ham at people telling them you were the sandwhich fairy
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
Bren left me with a lovely parting gift. Newfouund alcoholism. I'm on the kitchen floor, hugging a bottle of vodka. It's my only friend now.
I figure hes like disneyworld. You know youre only going once or twice in life. Might as well have fun and ride the rides
Grandpa got a dui while riding a horse. This is what I need to live up to.
Your shoe was in the washing machine. I have it in my pocket. My phone rang before and I answered your shoe. Meet me at the bar in 10.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
When you're awkward as a teenager, it never goes away. You just mask it. With makeup. And boobs.
How early is too early to study with margaritas?
My day in three words: secret purse cake
Anyone see the sob who took the piñata?
all we have is white fucking wine this is a travesty it's christmas not a fucking funeral
No i dont need a babysitter i have my cats. Cats can dial 911 ya know
Randomize