fucking a dude
i mean: fucking a, dude
wow, that comma made all the difference there
Do NOT cum in me, on me, or in my bed.
Turning 21 on Saint Patty's day. I like to think this is what my alcoholic ancestors have prepared me for
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
if we dont hook up this weekend, im doing both his roommates
We convinced you to take a shot out of the sponge...there were still suds in it.
Shit stained towel. The very symbol of how much closer we are as friends. Fall 011... beautiful disaster
We make out exclusively when we're drunk. That's like a relationship for me, right?
by the time the kitchen caught on fire everyone was too drunk to be alarmed. the host just poured beer on it to put it out. how was yours?
Drinking games this Saturday as usual although the ice cube tray game is banned due to last weeks incident
He kept checkin to make sure you were still alive after you passed out on his bed, After like the 4th time he walked back in there you were naked on his bed eating an apple, claiming he needed to be the Adam to your Eve..That drunk..
He told me he doesn't want to fuck anymore because he needs to focus on school. Either he grew a vagina or he's secretly gay, it has to be one of the two.
I'm only bisexual one week out of the month. Nothing like ovulation hormones to make the genders of my hookups seem completely irrelevant.
I think I just got booty called by someone I've never slept with or even really had a conversation with before.
I'm currently using a band-aid to cover my bar stamp from last night while I ask my professor for an extension. That's a sign of getting more responsible, right?
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