shes wearing a jean skirt, its frayed. i got this
Just saw your girl from last night... Be embarrassed
They were greeting people getting off the 48 with green beers and cheers. The one day I decide not to take the bus home...
I'm so disappointed in myself I can actually taste it.
Does it taste like semen?
Also, turning on the light this morning was a 3 step process. Way too hungover.
She gets me. First thing she said this morning "I'll buy breakfast if you can tell me my name."
i feel like the wall was a canvas for his penis.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I brought some guy back to have cheese whiz with me. Then sent him home
Was he satisfied?
No, and very vocal about it.
I found you in the bathroom. You were sitting cross-legged on the floor wearing nothing but socks completely surrounded by broken crayons.
I think it was a smart move. Quickest way to get over a guy, hook up with his friends.
He was pretty bad, I wanted pizza the whole time.
NO HE PUT HIS HAND IN HIS PANTS BEFORE HE TOUCHED THE BONG.
ILLEGAL
Take home message: SPERM IS EVIL AND SHOULD NEVER EVER EVER BE ALLOWED UP ONE'S NOSE.
Bro i just made a pipe out of a mechanical pencil and the top to an eye drop bottle. Does that make me some kind of pot god?
Randomize
