She had hickeys... what's up with that?? HAHAHA
After he finished I threw up my arms and shouted STEVE HOLT!
cab driver says "I saw your friend who opens her legs. she went home with two guys." pretty sure he was talking about you
Speaking of morons, I just found half a Subway sandwich in the bathroom drawer You or your brother?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
random question: do you know anywhere in the tri-state that has elephant racing? this is a work related question.
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
Dude, she got "I party too much" skinny. She looks like a recovering drug addict.
If throwing a bottle across the bar, hitting a skank in the head and not getting caught was an Olympic event, you'd bring merica the gold every time
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Treating myself to outback while reading the entire manual that comes with my birth control in public. Is this what single has come to?
I woke up with a bunch of jolly ranchers and an eight ball in my purse. Successful
Why are you barefoot at a strip club?
I just woke up and my ass is covered in honey and my eye brows are shaved off.
Are you texting me while pooping again?
I'm also playing fetch with the dog
Do you just want me to shit in a Jack-o-latern
Randomize