She made the grapes disappear! ALL OF THEM!!!
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
That's ok. I found a crab leg in my bed and have no pants on.
Yeah, my mom walked in on us. Instead of yelling, she went and hid in the bathroom til we finished. It was pretty classy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are sesame seeds in my vagina. This cannot be explained with logic.
there is no excuse for him not showing up to my st. patrick's day party. i touch his dick. i get him on the high holidays.
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
The van in front of me contains people having SEX. I am in full view of a SEX VAN.
Archery is over so let's go back to not giving a fuck for the next 3 years and 11 months
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I didn't notice because vodka
Want to go home, so casually slip my underwear in his pocket. Never seen him grin so big and say goodbye to his friends.
After he finished he sang his college fight song like it was some victory
Just go to your happy place. Mine is with Jake Gyllenhaal & schnapps
You've never felt ridiculous until you've walked through downtown in a Viking costume
Def don't remember taking those pics I sent you...but it looks like I was in a car? Shit. Looks like my Uber passenger rating just went up exponentially.
Randomize