K got coke dick during a threesome with two strippers. Say no to drugs.
Are you okay?
Don't worry. Self-respect preserved. My speech was Grey's quality... I made him cry.
i guess its not very common for a paramedic to have to revive someone who was struck by a falling shampoo bottle while getting off from the bathtub faucet.
They were so loud I wrote them a sex critique and taped it to his door.
We're official. Living with your boyfriend sounds so much better than fucking your roommate.
My #1 goal this summer is to get drunk at olive garden
She's licking the seat belt now. Feeling a little uncomfortable
i've hooked up with him and three of his roommates and not a single one of them knows about it..think its safe to say i found the silver lining in a boys inability to communicate
she asked me which thongs i though her boyfriend would like best. fuck the friend zone
oh sorry. I thought "boat" was code for "penis"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
your sister totally cock blocked me last night don't even think about inviting her to taco night
started my period, we have to try again next week
if we have anymore sex before that my dick is gonna fall off. that is in no way a complaint
I just want to sing to him and rub baby oil on his head
Randomize
