Sorry I wasn't really responding earlier. I was really fucking high and so into that car chase.
When I find myself drinking from a boot I just go with it and refuse to ask why.
She tried to cook Velveeta IN the oven on clean mode.
There was a fucking SNAKE in the urinal. WHAT THE FUCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
you got me arrested i just think that goes without question you owe me a blowjob
Well, I want to see you regardless of whether or not you will lick whipped cream off my body.
Night just started and I've already seen a woman headbutt a brick wall. Unintentionally. Epic to say the least
I was changing in front of my window and my neighbor text me saying, "nice pubes."
He kept humping my leg and whispering "dont worry, thats my phone not my penis"
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
It's like rock paper scissors. Cold showers and smoking beat hangovers.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
learned the hard way that breakfast jack daniels is a lot stronger than lunch or dinner jack daniels.
You ate all the burritos in sight....I cant take you to mexican restaurants anymore
The only food I have to eat is weed gummies and magic mushrooms... This is peak 34
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
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