marko just referred to some fat asian and a portly friend as Jupiter and one of its moons. unreal. hyte!
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
critical mistake not lubing the nipples
So I found the perfect "Yeah I gained weight since high school but it went to all the right places" outfit for the reunion this weekend.
You started throwing frozen shot glasses at people and you kept saying "it's fine, they melt."
Dude, I just had the best sex of my life in a porta potty at the NCAA girls lax championships but didn't get her name or number. But I have her sunglasses. How is this possible, I'm sad.
I love your life.
I sincerely hope you find your fuck buddy and have a wonderful night of champagne and whores
I could run a drunk marathon in heels
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
I just went through the Wendy's drive thru only wearing a towel. My life has hit an all time low
I refuse to be socially acceptable any longer than what is needed to pick up chinese food.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
is it fucked up if I wear crotchless panties to thanksgiving to make it easier for me to fuck my cousins friend.
God I love you.
I woke up with clothes on this morning and I'm pretty sure you had something to do with that. Thank you.
Cheyanne in woods. Ducks attacked. My toe is bleeding. We are gpsing our way home on foot. No worries
Randomize
