I cant take that shot because i want my penis to stay hard.
I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
How do I say to her "Have you eaten mango lately because my penis had an allergic reaction"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
so how do you plan on seducing my econ TA?
by telling him that he has a large supply and that i demand it...in my mouth. it shows him that i'm slutty and that i pay attention in econ
When you're on the hood of a car, 10 mph feels pretty fucking fast.
Now that Steinbrenner is in heaven he's going to make Jesus cut his hair
So after I pop out this baby we need to just go on a monthlong coke binge so I can get skinny again before vegas
He gave me four orgasms and I kept yelling "Thank you!" and he kept replying, "My pleasure!"
Midwestern nice.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So do you want to hear how I got the hickey first, or how I got the black eye?
We smoked with this guy who looked just like Hyde from that 70's show in an alley. It was a divine moment in my life.
I accidentally told my mom I broke my drug nail this weekend
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
I have easymac and six pack of beer. This night can't get any better.
He made me cum 3 times, then immediately after sex packed a bowl and passed it to me. Yeah.. I'll keep him.
Randomize