College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
Her vagina smelled like hockey gear.
IM INA KID IN KING ATURHTS CUNT!
A Kid In King Arthur's Court? Like the movie?
When i asked him what happened all he said was, the toucan... the toucan... over and over again.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
i did the responsible thing and pissed myself...
martini and pecan pie.. breakfast of champions.
Swear to god, if I have to wingman for you on my honeymoon I'm gonna be pissed
Um...any recollection of peeing in the pantry
You made out with my dog and told me he tasted like a rainbow.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Wear whatever you want, I'm wearing ass-less chaps and a sombrero
do you ever wish you could like, jerk your heart off and be, like, emotionally satisfied? it'd feel like cuddling.
Well I just finished dry heaving so I think breakfast is a little further out for me
I don't give a fuck that he's gay and keeps hitting on me. Free cocaine is free cocaine bro
I'm literally the definition of crunk, sunburnt, and dehydrated. I'm going to die tomorrow.
if it makes u feel better, i skipped class so i could go to a sex convention in jersey a few hours earlier than if i went to class.