Jerry, you need to find god
im gay
i know
yea but for you.
im having a hard time not telling ppl about ur bathroom story
I can do anything tonight that doesnt involve an erection.
i want the original willy wonka imagination song to come on when i take a girl to my room
He kept buying me shots of tequila. I decided to just save myself the half hour of toilet hugging and tell him straight up that I intended on sleeping with him. We got Tacos on the way home with all the money we saved.
Just smoked out of an apple with Steve Jobs. I love Halloween.
It took him 5 seconds to cum and then he wanted to hold my hand all night
There was definitely a significant amount of cookie dough in my bra
Oh just chilling alone with a stranger baby while everyone else clambakes the bathroom. Probation is the reason there is bad things in the world.
Like "oh its Monday, gotta get wasted today!" not "oh its Monday.. Gotta go to class"
Nothing says "welcome to Denver" like a hot 18 year old giving you directions to the dispensary and ending up blowing you in the backseat
Honestly, I want an afternoon of mild abuse, mixed with face fucking and general molestation that turns in love making, laughter and cinnamon toast crunch naked in bed.
Is that your mom climbing in your window dude
on one hand I spent like $120 last night..on the other that was the best sex of my life
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