Masterbating to gospel music is like god cheering on your orgasm
I wouldnt endorse that guy if he was walking in a walkathon to raise money for a disease i had
Apparently senior citizens don't like that position
I like that most of our conversations somehow end in us having sex for the good of our country
Wheres my "thanks for using birth control effectively and not contributing to the downfall of society" card.
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
i wonder if cab drivers are trained in the art of delivering girls back to their dorms on Saturday mornings. because mine was so nice that he dropped me off at the back of my building so no one would see me.
We fucked on a kid's slide, my vagina is singing praises of being used
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
Woke up on the floor with shoes on my hands...I'd say it was a success
I may watch porn and eat a baked potato covered in chili in bed
That wasn't even sex. That was a fuckoning
...did you just create a word for what we did?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
He ate me out for an eternity. Like fell asleep, woke up, and he was still doing it.
Plan b and 5 hour enegery breakfast of a champion
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