i want to open my blinds to let the sunlight in my room, but i'm afraid my neighbors will be able to see me drinking and judge me
Is it sad i was sitting here thinkin how i would only fuck Rob Pattinson if he was glittery at said time.
Just so we both are on the same page, I have no solid plans as to where I'll be sleeping tonight.
did you hook up at the wedding?
No but I jerked off on the hotel sheets. I wanted to get my moneys worth.
Is drinking merlot and watching womens figure skating by myself gay?
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
cheese fries, coffee, with a side of dry heaving in the bathroom at the diner on campus at 5am. never felt better.
Yeah it'll definitely be worth it. Not having syphilis all the time you know
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
Second time this week margarita night turned homoerotic
Sitting here reading the internet and all i have to show for this summer is a shitty tan and the possible case of clamidia.
Just got a blowjob from a coed in exchange for saving her an iPhone 5 when I get them in stock. Sometimes it's awesome to be a Verizon employee.
Dude. Photoshop a Santa hat on your mug shot and send it as your Christmas cards.
Tonight is an "I'm lonely and single so I'm going to curl up in a warm, melatonin and vodka enriched ball in the corner of my bed with a cat." kind of night.
First time not coming to this class high in a month and a half, never again will i put myself thru this torture
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