I just saw what sperm look like swimming around. I'm not happy with what you've put in my stomach.
im not an educated person. i just do things. and it works out in my favor
I wish straight boys touched me the way gay boys do.
Law school is ruining my masturbation schedule.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Its a bummer that corporate america doesn't believe in $2 u call its on a Sunday night
Dude, if she brings up the lube, you know nothing
Are you also wondering how we get home after the party bus?
Home?
Why does She think it's her duty to welcome in freshman through the welcome mat that is her vagina
Guess who was PASSED OUT ON A BMW. I shit you not
Stop it right now
This time face forward
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
CALL 911 HAND IS STUCK IN THE GARBAGE DISPOSAL. HELP
Do we still have any pizza left from last night?
Well for decently drunk, in the woods, last-person-i-should-be-hooking-up-with sex, i thought it was pretty good.
I already tell everyone in my office my bf is at the Naval academy. It slipped one time and I can't go back on it now
I'm high. I apologize for that last sentence
Can't talk, I'm icing "sorry I barfed on your couch" onto a cookie cake
FYI there's a girl here with happy daddy written on her tits
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