Admittedly I was a little ambitious with some of the positions but you walked in during the worst of it.
dear sober me, don't br the first to open the fridge in the morning
i finally found my car by the hideout. it was parked in an employee only parking space with a torn up piece of paper in the back window with the word employee scribbled on it.
Hmmm just stalked him and according to his facebook he wants "whatever he can get." obviously he'd be open to the idea.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
He lectured me about the dangers of drugs while wearing a sombrero and doing interpretive dance.
He came in both my eyes, then refused to give me a towel unless I found him by playing Marco Polo
Well the "Blackout with your sack out" party turned out predictably.
We hit a golf ball off Brady's ass. His dignity flew away into the night.
sometimes, you gotta take him by the hands like tails took sonic, and fly him into the bedroom.
You threw a handful of caps into a pitcher of Heineken and asked everyone if they wanted to go "bobbing for molly"
I threw up vodka and borscht. I'm done with life...I threw this up in a McDonald's bathroom btw.
Yeah, I've hit on priests at bars, too. Such a shame, there are a lot of hot men out there who've devoted themselves and their glorious genitalia to the Lord -_-
I found a Trump-humping republican virgin born on the goddamn Fourth of July. I NEED to hate-fuck him.
he invited me over. we listened to jazz, smoked weed, then cerebrally fucked each other over a three hour game of chess
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