physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
i was texting myself key events from last night so i could remember this morning. looked at my phone, texted my mother instead. our numbers differ by 1 digit
ran into someone who graduated hs with us while i was paying for booze in quarters. i love it when people from my past catch me in my classier moments.
Just woke up on a dolphin floaty wearing only a party hat. There's blood on the side of the pool and glass in the sauna. Worst fucking hangover. But some guy said he is making crepes so its ok
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
cheating on your boyfriend is the best diet ever, I've barely eaten in days. The guilt is killing me
Taking my tights off outside the club to give them to the homeless man was my contribution to humanity. The fact that it was snowing just made me feel like superman.
We were laying in the basement dry humping to the rhythm of the washing machine
she's crying and begging for her chapstick and insisting on walking home...her every thursday ritual
Fell asleep with Kristen and woke up with Sarah. It's official, vacation has begun.
For the first time in my life, I may be the most normal person in the room.
Update: I am definitely the most normal person in this room. And the least tattooed.
He walked around my apt complex completely naked and started peeing in the maintenance because he thought it was the bathroom. So yeah, pretty drunk.
Also, full disclose I puked in a fruit barrel box
Just tried to do a line with a snorkel I cut off... that is how my Aruba trip is going!
No one wants to start their day off with bloody lemons and a tampon in the toilet. Wtf.
Randomize