some girl had on jean underwear. i hate america.
Handjob with gloves on results in friction burn. In case you've ever wondered
I totally accidentally said "we don't go around hammering girls in the rear" in front of 132 5th graders today.
Also, I'm sat on the floor drinking cava because life is just not working for me tonight.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There should be an open time period where you show each other your goods and it's totally socially acceptable to bail.
I wholeheartedly concur
Emoji's do wonders when you actually have nothing at all to say..
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
Naked snow angels was a very bad idea. My vag is now frozen shut.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Somehow his homemade liquor activated memories of my semester abroad three years ago. I ended up yelling random medical advice in German, while my roommates played dress-up with the cat stoned out of their minds. I consequently gave up on dating. Back in the ONS game.
I just masturbated at work... Don't know why but I thought you should know
What's a nice way of saying 'I wish I hadn't fucked you.'
What. The. Fuck.
You'll have to be more specific. I do a lot of "what the fuck" kind of stuff
I'm gonna go take a shower so I can cleanly change into my drinking underwear.
My fuck it list is complete! I finally got a firefighter!
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