I need a man. I think Im going to put myself on Craigs list since they caught the killer and all.
Do it and if you add naked pictures youll get an instant reply
So are we goin out tonight?
Dude, we woke up in your car in some parking lot last night...
And that was fun, wasn't it?
Yeah I'm about to go down a waterslide that comes out a 2nd story window. I love college.
I just bought 1/2 a fifth of vodka out of an old school baby carriage from a homeless man. Gotta love this city.
it was pretty much a given that i would lose my thong on dollar tequilla shot night
You kept making that girl eat peanuts, saying they were good for her baby..... I don't think she pregnant
i told him i should keep a toothbrush at his house for after all the times i threw up there. he said yes but i wasnt getting a key to the apt
I have officially had sex in every room on my floor. Don't say I'm not an amazing RA.
I've liked him since I puked on him on my birthday so I want it to be special.
Yea... you were given too many get out of jail free cards. God just gave up on you having a healthy and happy vagina.
Joined a porch party below me by climbing out the window and jumping off the roof. Tonight will be good
And I don't know if this is really ESP, or just a crazy feeling, but I'm pretty sure he has an std. Or at least a cold.
Who looks around on a bright, sunny day and says, "you know what? Today I'm going to write gay dinosaur erotica"
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
A massage should never include spaghetti sauce. shit was fucked up
Randomize
