I am currently trying to use a tide to go pen to remove the jizz from my backseat, it's not working...
I love my bros weed
Im gonna hate it in like 20 mins though
well isn't that the pot calling the kettle a make out whore
Still drunk just puked in the meat cooler tried to clean it up with ham. Its not working
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Well right now I am watching him use the fire extinguisher off the pourch.
Cavemen vs astronauts. weapons to be determined. Who would win?
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I don't even fuck like that, he just happened to be in the right place at the right drunk.
Two options. One, you listen while I freak out. Two, we have mediocre to awesome car sex and don't talk. Either way, I'll be there by 7
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He has a bathrroom scale in his room with an alarm attached to it so anything over 150 sets it off and in his drinking stupper he can make a run for it.
All I'm saying is that if he knows his wife walks around naked during the day, he shouldn't bring a friend home for lunch and show up unannounced.
All I need is $1,500, a beach ready body, a bigger dick & this will be the best spring break ever.
I'm literally spending $165 to fly to Arizona to have a sex road trip coming back
Apparently I’m a terrible influence when alcohol is involved
Note to self: NEVER have sex with anyone who is experiencing explosive diarrhea.
I've never been so happy to be celibate.
Randomize