Your mom is more observant then Randy Newman.
what am i going to do when LOST is over? What am i going to get high to?
Remember when I booked a hotel room for next sat? Nneither do I.
I was batman and I saved her. Then we had sex on a rooftop.
My first sex dream, I blew myself. Yours definitely wins.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There is a guy, stoned out of his mind, only wearing slippers and a bathrobe in the library.
He just texted me from the outside of the hospital. He called the fat broad in the bar mrs snuffleupagus about 60 times and she broke a bottle of blackberry brandy over his head.
I have to stop envisioning penises as dragons.
All I know is that your reaction after this date with him was "I think I did cocaine" so I'm sold on this boy
There is nothing quite so pathetic as sitting in bed in your underwear eating easy mac in complete silence, waiting for Netflix to load
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I'm just going to have crazy good sex with him until one of us developed feelings that works in the movies right?
A guy just picked up ur brother and carfied him away singing and im slight concern
I don't trust a bar IN TENNESSEE that doesn't have Jack Daniels.
I'm pretty sure I regained my virginity last night
He pulled out the guitar, sat in tub, and took requests while she puked her brains out in the toilet. I think he loves her.
She yelled “outlaw country” right before we heard the police siren
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