i'm trying to reconcile what i did last night with who i am as a person.
I sat a few seats down and one row behind a cute girl at the Cubs game today. Having watched her talk to the guy next to her, I found out only her name and age. I then used that information and pieced it together with over 500 girls on Facebook with the same name. I found the same girl, and we're now fbook friends.
if being a creepy fuck was an olympic sport, they'd think you were using performance enhancing drugs...
You even been so high breaking up weed with your fingers feels like surgery?
It's refreshing to see you in something that is stained with something other than vomit and spilled alcohol.
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
My hickies are dark enough that I can feel drivers judging me from across an intersection
He's nice but I'm a one bouncer kind of girl
No, absolutely not. If you see that cunt, throw confetti or eggs at her.
That's a pretty extreme jump from confetti to eggs
We're Scorpios. We're like dogs rolling in whatever smells good to us.
Woke up on the couch with one cowboy boot on and a hat over my crotch. God bless texas.
Well I'm in a stranger's bed.
Gotta leave to watch the Lions
It's just unfortunate that I still have the image of him having sex with me fresh in my mind
DO NOT THROW SOUP AT YOUR SCREEN
Nah leave him alone, he is at the strip club with his mom.
She put her coat on went to leave and called me an asshole. I responded with "I never said I wasn't" and then she pounced on me like a cat on cat nip.
Randomize
