the last thing i remember is you screaming lets hunt humans.
So am I a slut for not remembering his name after sex last night or not recognizing him in the cafe today after he told me who he was?
I made an oral joke and he laughed... That's when I realized I wasn't Daddy's Little Girl anymore.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
When you wake up in your dorm right outside your room with the key in the door, then you will understand my pain.
Going to the market. I need some nachos and a serious re-evalution of my life.
he needs to stop knowing everyone on campus...it's making cheating on him really difficult.
Until you wake up with a Hustler club stripper in the next room whose nipple you were coerced to lick at Snake & Jake's after breaking up a fight between an Indian and a Filipino, I don't wanna hear about your weird.
You have to understand, he didn't so much come out of the closet as he backflipped out of it with an accompanying marching band.
I was just too high to be in rapids man. I just screamed for the entire time I was jostling about.
After we had sex he made me watch a Top Gun highlight video...
By the way can you translate "sorry, she played you bruh" to Spanish? Some Hispanic guy who spoke absolutely no English callled me last night and when I tried to tell him he had the wrong number the response was "como? No no no no...." And then click. He was gone
I just came rly close to telling a dude that I want to chew on him and there should be an oil painting of his ass up in the louvre before I realized that isn't how flirting is supposed to go
I'm sorry for getting drunk and throwing a robo-bird at you.
dude idk where I am. fuckin like. there wheat field and a horizon and shit. I think I got on a bus? some dude named Sam gave me a pamphlet about Jesus.
Randomize
