Go study a dick amy that's outrageous
I want to give you a handjob with my mouth.
im officially scared..,i finally realized who my boyfriend reminds me of! spencer pratt
I keep pulling short curlies out of my mouth. Not cool
I find it ironic that homeless people are so good in bed
Dear male population: sorry for being such a dick tease but thanks for paying for my bar tab and drunk food
her orgasm sounded like a fucking walrus crying.
whatever sunny in Philadelphia does on Thursday nights, I'm doing all weekend.
so,apparently a side effect from having sex on the beach is now i have a tanline shaped like your sister
i hate you
Acid flashbacks - fact or fiction? Have been seeing a surprising amount of sparkly shit this afternoon...
And I was slip and sliding my life away on a giant tarp with tons of soap and bitches. Priorities man, priorities.
Went home drunk last night and peed on my Christmas tree, my mothers going to fucking kill me
lesson #1 of freshman year: grinding with a sombrero is difficult
I told the bartender that his red, white and blue shots were terrible and tasted like Thomas Jefferson's balls.
It's like his penis moved in and did some interior decorating without telling me first...
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