i just saw a guy carrying a medieval times commemerative glass filled with vomit.. there were 2 people cheering him from behind
why is it whenever you puke in the park there are always little kids on the swings?
It's a line of coke at 10 a.m. kind of Saturday. Don't be a pussy about life.
Yeah well I used to see how many bud lights I could slam down during the pledge of allegiance, my record was 4, but I could do better now.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Drunk. The frashmen love me. Give them. Toilrt paper. And shiots
At some point i could of swore that you were in my bedroom riding a manatee last night..... I like my new dealer
I want to get so drunk, you will need subtitles to understand me. Rough week.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He thought he was ordering for the whole party so when he came back with thirty burritos and four of us were left, he wasn't happy
Our first order of business as new roommates was to test the sex acoustics of our rooms. I need a new box spring.
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Well... This is my last night at the resort. So far, the only thing that has been in my vagina is sand.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
Showed up to pick her up in my boxers. Lets just say im 2 for 2 with this new idea
Randomize