I just punched cris angel in the balls. I have photos.
Just found the book "How to Stay Christian in College" on my roommates desk. At a loss for words...
They were so slutty we had to play "rarely have I ever."
I spent all day at the mall with her, then she made me actually watch a walk to remember then decided to tell me she was on her period. This one is either really crafty or I am really desperate.
she walked in on me snorting my prozac. there was no way to convince her i was doing a good thing.
in my defense i said 'lock up your wives' before going out.
ill be fine wheb you get back. I'm gunna do real world things like washing the dishes. having to perform serious tasks brings you down.
I hope I take a shit on your face in your dreams tonight.
pretty sure that drunk girl we saw climbing the stairs is now DJing this club....
Accidently said "your going to hurt the baby" when he got forceful with his thrusts. I guess I forgot to mention to him that we are pregnant.
He was sleeping, but the way he was made him look like an adorable, fuzzy penis
It's was about average. But he had a tat on his thigh that said "pull-out n' rollout" so I won't have to worry about a round two request.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
its like my brain is a tree and you are those little cookie elves
I'm in the kitchen making quiche for my fuck buddy and his wife. I'm probably not the chick to get dating advice from.
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