TLC. RIGHT NOW. PRIMORDIAL TODDLERS.
I googled Canada's legal age of consent. I have good news. It's 14. Justin Bieber here I come...
Lindsay lohan: road to jail is on E tonight. Bring vodka we are not missing an opportunity to make a drinking game out of this
What a whore. She reminds me of that asian guy who can eat all the hotdogs.
is election day enough of a holiday to justify getting fucked up on a tuesday?
I am solely responsible for the birth of their child. I mean, I did push them into the room and hold the door shut yelling "punch that kitty!". It has to be a sign.
Im doing shots of vodka in the bathroom covered in pillows.
Tornado warnings are fun!
I'm buying drugs in the library...And it's not even finals time. What has my life become?
mind if i send you a dick pic? so you can see what she wasn't doing right?
I'm high and craving hash browns from McDonalds. Please pick me up. I also would like a hug and a supportive pat on the back when you get here. Thanks.
Its two in the afternoon. McDonalds don't sell hash browns at 2 in the afternoon. Whore. The hug I can provide however.
not even kidding I just received the single most greatest head I have ever had.. It was unreal. It was like stick my dick into a silk bag of puppy ears.
is it too much for me to say that i have a ziplock bag with ice in it in my underwear?
he had a beard, sexy nerd glasses and kept referring to his penis as 'this dick' its like jesus was saving my perfect match for my prime
my mom said i came home and fell asleep on the floor. like right in front of her.
Thank you for being so charming, but do you have syphilis?
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