chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
I went to the haunted house just to see her - Hello new fetish!
It took years to rebuild my brains forcefield against your charm and I feel like u seal team 6'd ur way in again and caught my common sense sleeping on post
Good afternoon everyone! Just texting to inform you that Andrew, your emotionally detached man-whore, will be back starting this weekend. Please RSVP.
I'm going to take a nap so I don't feel like a stripper sneezed in my mouth tomorrow morning at work.
I wore a bird inflatable and still got laid. So there's that.
ALMOST WRECKED MY SCOOTER. DAVE FRANCO HAS A TWIN AMD HE GOES HERE
All I know is I drank too much, danced too little.. yet somehow woke up on the floor in the arms of some cowboy.
I just gave him road head. He came in the Taco Bell drive thru which seems pretty typical for my life.
I remember eating bacon bits off your chest that night... I'll never look at bacon pizza the same way
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Mom just walked in on a bj. IT'S WHATEVER.
yes that’s a photo of a horny gay donkey
Oh I know. I’ve known many horny gay donkeys in my time.
She was a cheerleader in college and President of her sorority and now she’s a sales rep for a pharmaceutical corporation. “High maintenance hot” doesn’t even begin to explain it
But dear lord is it worth it
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