butt sex is not good for yourself don't do it
Thanks?
BLOW JOB GIRL IS IN WALMART
Some people actually refer to her as Kaitlyn you know.
I felt like a fire hydrant the vomit just kept coming out
I can practically hear my vag and my conscience fighting.
Nah it's cool, I made him pinky promise me he wouldn't die if I left him passed out in the bathroom.
this is a time for prayers...seriously
let us hold hands and pray.. sweet baby jesus please bring us some sweet sweet man loving this homecoming weekend to aid our lonely vaginas it has been a long couple of weeks amen.
i think every time you texted me i responded with 'bathroom floor'
you described his penis as a "portable fishing pole"
You're gonna die alone anyway. Even if you do meet a man, they die earlier than women. Best case, you have to deal with grieving over his death and then die alone a couple years later. Worst case, you get a terminal illness and he divorces you, leaving you to die alone anyway.
Thanks, mom.
You can do it. What doesn't kill us just drives us to drink
He has pizza coupons and a hammer next to his toilet.
Well when you get back to your computer, there's a nice explanation of pansexuality on your Skype.
You realize your sleeping pills are working when you pick up your iPhone and almost bite it because you thought it was a graham cracker
We can get high as fuck when there are no orders. If not its cool. I just figured Take Your Blunt Buddy To Work Day.
I'm rolling and just noticed that the thread count on these sheets is horrendous.
Randomize
