I think my hot accountant is wearing banana republic. I miss the days when that ='ed gay. Signals are so confusing now.
she's basically destroyed all of the faith i had that skinny blond girls could be a functioning part of society.
foreplay: 7 minutes. sex: 3 minutes. cuddling: 10 minutes. getting dressed: 5 minutes. commute: 5 minutes.
Is it bad to use cherry nyquil as substitute for grenadine? Because i just went there.
Nah, totally cool. It already has the alcohol in it.
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
I can't believe that 100lb chick tackled me through a flight of stairs
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
Nm. Exausted and my teeth just fell out again
Quick question: how do I take a nice picture of my ass? I'm asking you because I figure with an ass like yours you're probably experienced.
I HAVEN'T FUCKED ANYONE IN FOREVER AND A HALF I DON'T DESERVE TO BE A TRASHY BLONDE
My mom just gave me my fake back to buy her more wine.
Come over. I've made 2 dinners and so many cocktails. I'm a 50's housewife with no family.
I am going to piss jack daniels before daylight.
Daylight. It is daylight. Who will give you a ride back?
I hope no one. I want to walk and have a bus hit me.
He has an accent, blue cross AND gainful employment. Just saying, he's going to urgent care once I'm done with him
last night you said that you wanted to hold my dick as you slept because it was like having a stuffed animal.
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