Yeah, it wasn't as bad as I thought. I tried not to clench and things went pretty smoothly.
rough night. sneezed a watermelon seed this morning and apparently I drunk dialed my boss for a ride home. twice.
i paused nhl 10 while i jerked off and it was like a crowd was cheering me on
Just had sex in the basement of the library... I knew I was paying $120,000 for something more than a law degree
Have you been tested recently?
Well I got my shots when I was a baby so I think I'm immune
FYI, when you wake up, please note that I puked in your shoes because I sstubbed my tooee, not becus I was drunk.
The other night after we fucked we talked about Lowe's vision insurance. Never fuck a coworker.
I remember all the people and all the acts I just have to match the person with the act
He said he wanted to make me his Twinkie, "filled with his delicious cream." ABSOLUTELY 100% NO YOU MAY NOT REPEAT ****NOT**** GIVE HIM MY NUMBER EVER EVER EVER. Please confirm receipt and full comprehension of this message.
styled my pubes into a mustache as a surprise. Thought you should know
I want to lick his teeth again. Is that a creepy thing to say?
he has a party story that rivals our "PTSD- soldier-with-a-knife" party story. I'm pretty sure this is part of some prophecy.
I just want somebody to fondle my boobs while I read fanfiction. Is that too much to ask?
I just had all of the sex. All of it.
I'm totes in the mood to go home and like blindly inhale dangerous amounts of porn
Randomize
