I've seriously contemplated telling him the baby isn't his just so I can meet Maury Povich
I actually kind of like the booze poos. It's like a colon cleanse. I feel skinnier.
I'm coming over to use your dick. I need to take my aggression out on something. Hope that's cool.
The Fresno prostitute seemed offended all I wanted from her was directions back to the freeway.
Yo. I have a shitload of cardboard. We have to build a smoke hut in the smoke room with a tunnel connected to a cat house. This way the kitty can join us whenever she pleases
i’m not very adjusted to having free time. for example, I forgot how much fun it is to masturbate.
It's official. I'm gonna fuck hot art class guy. But this won't be like hot Samsung guy. I'm gonna make sure I follow through this time.
Never in my life did I dream that I would meet and NFL linesman, let alone that he would be standing before me dressed as a Roman centurion and asking for Vaseline.
I haven't had a bra on since I quit my job.
He played with my nipples while singing "How great thou art"
honestly if there were pictures of last night i would be embarrassed.... im embarrassed without pictures
Change the sheets & put your dick in the dishwasher. I'll see you in an hour.
I wiped my ass with a McDonalds wrapper. I've hit an all time low. Sorry for my impatience
I think I fell asleep on my pizza last night. Damn, I am sauccccy.
Sorry. Im too sleepy to penis.
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