oh my god i am going to vomit. and little burgers wearing crowns are going to come out.
All his texts have the signature of a date with a smile. I asked him what it means. IT'S THE DAY HE QUIT DOING DRUGS
He is offering to pay me back by sending me a dick pic.
.......................................
My thoughts exactly.
You just begged me to mute the porn and watch her ass bounce while listening to dubstep the whole time.
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And nobody saved him?? That chick had like three teeth TOPS
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
In either case, seeing now as it's basically two couples, unless we're planning to have a good old fashion orgy I think this isn't going to work out so well.
ok it turns out chain mail does not protect against falling down a flight of stairs. please send help.
Know what I do when I'm in that mood? Whenever anyone talks to me I just hiss like a cat. They go away.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I get so many dick pics from him...He has an unhealthy obsession with his own penis...
Stop sending me pictures of you naked. This violates the friend zone agreement.
I'd marry him just to keep his penis in the country
So uh... Did you mail me business cards that describe my profession as "tortured soul"?
All I can taste is Pickle Juice and Cocaine.
hey im sorry i made fun of the color of your sheets, but like it was all i could focus on during sex because they were just THAT UGLY
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