ps... at the end of one of the videos you yell "let's do the eiffel tower again.. i'll be in the middle!" .. i almost died lolol
Just so you know, the bottle of red gatorade is NOT GATORADE. It is definitely someone's puke. I hope nobody else makes the same mistake I did.
i would bitch about being this hungover, but honestly im just happy to be alive after this weekend
sometimes you just have to pull up your panties, blow a kiss to the security camera and walk out of the alley like nothing happened.
you kept yelling "this bitch stole my phone" to the guy who found you passed out in the parking lot
just got the results back. i love his dick even more now i know its clean
If I am going to pay someone to make me puke, it's going to be the bartender.
Pizza delivery...for when you need to eat your feelings for the sex you aren't having
You wanted to thank my penis. You wanted me to take the condom off so you could touch it and thank it.
I'm ready to sell my soul to the strip club tonight
I'm still confused. So he's NOT your cousin by blood, but WAS your cousin, on two separate occasions, by marriage? Still too weird I think...
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
Also, do you think i could get away with finishing my vodka cranberry from last night at work if i put orange juice in it? Serious question.
You got your ass kicked outside KFC on Tuesday
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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