PS - I'm in bed with an 18 yr old-am I a cougar?
No - puma.
idk if its the weather or the "im still drunk" or the morning sex i just had with my roommates gf but that was def the most enjoyable walk in the rain ever
I tried to cut him off and he said "I was the president of a fraternity for 3 years, I could outdrink God."
Seeing a catheter being inserted into a penis severely diminished my sex life
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
Woke up with a raging boner...good feeling abt this trial
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I HAVE NEVER BEEN FRIENDZONED IN MY LIFE AND THIS GIRL IS GOING TO MAKE ME QUESTION EVERYTHING. LIKE A GODDAMN CUNT. A WONDERFUL, BEAUTIFUL, MAJESTIC, LESBIAN CUNT.
So dude comes out in a full body leotard and a wand and announced he's king of the gays. Chicago is a weird but fun place
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He added me to his contacts as 'boot and rally'...have you ever been more proud to be related to me?
I can't wait to tell mom.
Baruch atah adonai DAT ASS DOE
Someone left a middle school yearbook here. I recognized one kid from banging his mom last year.
YOUUUU FUCKING FURRYYYY
I DIDN'T COME HERE TO BE SLANDERED LIKE THIS
I just did my taxes to sober up, I'm THAT hungover
I woke up with what has to be a whole pack of smarties loose in my bra. Was that your fault?
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