i just masturbated with purell and my dick burns and smells like a hospital
I just fired a shotgun out of the back of a truck going 60. i am going to miss oregon.
you may be an alcoholic when your drug dealer calls to yell at you for drinking too
My goal for this summer is to make enough extra money to be able to afford the ticket for water skiing naked.
Supposedly i was taking multiple birth control pills while screaming dot judge me. Never going back
Dude give me 4 good reasons we shouldn't trade girlfriends tonight
I forgot how wholesome of a place a park is when youre not drinking there.
I just had sex over my oven then high fived the guy. It's going to be a good year.
I got another blow job proposal last night. Skills.
my roommates tied me up with rope and duct tape then left me outside the door to the hot girls' suite on my floor, knocked on the door and ran away leaving me there with a sign that says free
I hope Team Snapchat has been enjoying our sex snaps all this week.
Secrets from the porn industry: liTERALLY SHOVE A SEA SPONGE UP YOUR VAGINA GO ON DO IT
By talk things out did he mean have passionate angry sex?
Dude how about today while I was on lunch someone died in the break room at work....I didn't even know we had a break room!!
I just remembered something from last night. check your closet.
Randomize
