You got off, kissed my dick and whispered "stay hard" to it, puked and then got right back on top of me like nothing happened...
I just threw up in my hands while sitting on the toilet
Slept on the counter again. Mom covered me in an apron.
i gave him a hand job with one hand and held the 40 with the other. this is like freshman year all over again.
I'm not as easy in Europe as I am in the US
Only because you can wipe your slut slate clean & start anew. It's a little known benefit of our currency exchange.
It got heated then she just left and I was all alone in the women's restroom.
Is it bad if I just put band-aids over my nipples? Way too hungover be dealing with a bra
He's way too stoned. I took him to el bra and he's laying on the table, not sure what to do with him
Hit on in the middle of a Wal-Mart McDonald's by a really awkward nerd. There is not enough nope in the world.
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I do NOT want my proposal story to start "...he was peeing on me and then..."
I had sex in the back of a hot foreign guy with a lacoste eye patch's car
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
A bitchslap is in order.
We have ur drink. Mom passed out in the bathroom. I'm goin to the other bathroom. Bs at the top of the stairs on way outside.
Randomize
