i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
if every girl in minneapolis isn't pregnant when i get back to the cities i will cry
You pointed at his crotch then made a thrusting motion. I think it's safe to say every guy at my college loves you.
Hindsight: maybe I should have included a few transitional texts in between talking about your son and my need to have sex. Do over?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I want to fuck you with a popsicle till it melts then eat it out of you
Really.
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
No gifts needed, but if you have fireworks or weed that'd be good.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Do they mail horrible human being awards or do I have to pick it up or what's the protocol on that shit
I got a 5/5 with my "I don't want a baby" rant essay. She said my use of the word "leeches" was a powerful metaphor :)
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I think I'm in the negatives for the quantity of fucks given today.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
I woke up with a giant paw print on the side of my face, my jaw hurts, and I have no idea how any of this happened.
Randomize