He told me he had never done that before...I responded with "clearly"
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
don't leave me alone with all the disney princess sluts
her cat watched me eat her out... I would use the alternate term for both of those things but it's too weird.
First night in the new apartment. There are 12 people here i don't know, Tequila, and a crying girl locked in our bathroom. I think the apartment christening is complete.
Either I'm a lot drunker than I thought, or he has three dicks....
I think I'm gonna have to go with the first one...
At a St Pats house party. Just raised $110 for two short chicks to crawl into a dog cage together. Video forthcoming. Respect.
I picked up a chick last night on crutches wearing a I am boobman tshirt. I love raves.
Yeah. I mean it wasn't that awkward. I just made conversation like there was absolutely no lack of pants.
All the drunken hookups over the last year are self destructing, at least something is keeping nursing school interesting
but I truly enjoy making out with my best friend more than my boyfriend
I've had sex to the movie Tommy Boy too many times to be acceptable.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
I want your cock. I also want to cuddle you and tell you how amazing you are, because you know balance.
Well, the night started out with you ALMOST falling out of a tree. Then we went back to the tree after about 9 shots and you DID fall out of the tree.
Randomize
