I am going to fall madly in love with a ginger, marry the ginger and have lil ginger children running all around town. Oy
You shut your mouth
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
I was just compiling a top 5 blowjobs list and that's in there for sure.
You were so high you insisted on spoon feeding me your KFC bowl while I was driving.
Was who let the dogs out playing?
Ya. You started barking when it ended
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I applaud your efforts, but I have to say it was the bear we encountered that ultimately shut down the entire operation
I'm really glad that we can be casual hook up buddies. This is a true friendship. Now, please convince your roommate to do the same. Thanks.
I think you should just bang him and get it out of your system.
That's what you say about everyone.
I find it fascinating that she'd be more comfortable with her mom finding out she submits dirty disney confessions on tumblr than about her secret email account she uses to chat with dutch and brazilian strangers.
Is eating a dinner of fishsticks and gin mean you're failing at adulthood? I'm asking for a friend.
Please come over. It's a pajama and burn-2016-in-effigy party
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
Is it too much to ask for 10 minutes of privacy while I masturbate?
Just got my LSAT score...if you need me I'll be drunk in a ditch somewhere.
Randomize
