I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
I think i really like him...he was super cuddly and kept me company.
stop. you already have a dog
The only reason you're wearing underwear tonight is cause you have a family dinner before
My doc was like ur only supposed to have 6 sexual partners..thats just one semester at college
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this one can actually spell my name, that's a shoe-in
Does he know anything about your personal life besides what you look like without clothes on?
Is snow just God skeeting all over the place??
Yes. Yes it is.
you said you wanted to feel how much my penis weighed for educational purposes
i think she just faxed a picture of her vag from the office copy machine... i mean what kind of sexting is that... wait is that even legal???
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Is her birthday actually on cinco de mayo? That makes so much sense
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
It makes me feel all patriotic & free... And borderline diabetic.
Let he who has not made drunken spaghetti at 3 a.m. cast the first stone.
You proposed a left ass cheek firmness contest and got a surprising number of contestants. Then you ruined it by groping someone who wasn't playing and awarding them first place.
don't take offense to this but at the strip club tonight I legit believed one girl was you. almost hopped on stage and freaked out at you. you're a beauty.
Randomize