nothing as in nothinggggg kills the mood for me is when a girl with 4 cm nipple hair
don't bother texting me at 10. my pants WILL be off and I'm not putting them back on to come see you.
Stop making excuses. You can be here in 5 and cumming in 10
I'm blazed about to take my 8am final. Another girl is too. We just looked each other in the eyes. She's my soul sister.
Housing came buy and confiscated our shopping cart :(
Don't ask how or why, but I think the 775 on the inside of my lip is permanent
As a jewish boy dating her she thinks everypart of christmas is my first time. Helllllo bj under mistletoe!!
He ate me out. IN THE MORNING. I love less attractive men.
You then showed up downstairs in only a robe, telling everyone how you were "the most chivalristic fratstar ever."
I cried at the bar for 30 minutes because I got my arm stuck in my sweater. I got free drinks for the rest of the night after the bartender helped me.
I'm discussing Magic Mike with my mom and totally get why she thinks I'm gay.
YOU LEFT MY FUCKING BRA OUTSIDE OF YOUR HOUSE AND NEVER TEXTED ME.
Today's hangover is brought to us by Sailor Jerry's and your dedication to my alcoholism.
His sister hates me so I took his virginity on her bed
What did you delete my number or something
Oh honey. What makes you think I saved in in the first place?
Randomize
