just saw ex-bf. should he be more embarrassed to be a college dropout working at rite aid or should i be because i was buying newports and rembrant?
tie
i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
It sucks..Now I'm depressed because appearence wise, she's the closest to my favorite pornstar I'll ever get..
I woke up with a new Tiffanys necklace on. I'm such a classy drunk.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
So I think I might just embrace the awkwardness and say he fingerblasted her cause thats the greatest word in existence
Wtf are freshmen gonna think when the first thing they see in a pale 6'4 white kid with a mustache yelling ya man and we be liming in a Trinidadian accent
Just like to put it out there it's surprising how little reception a dog cage has
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Was booty called last night and I was so blacked out that my roomie made me puke before going to "eye of the tiger." Why I'm still single is beyond me
i tried to propose to him with my nipple ring but i couldnt figure out how to take it out
Please don't tell me that blonde guys name is Matthew I won't be able to fuck a guy with my brothers name
Sex while Star Warsing is the best
its hard to say precisely how it happened, but the next thing i knew i was on top of a mountain
I got sriracha sauce on my mask while I was eating fast food, now wearing it makes me hungry
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