so I'm never txting u again after today...
y?
cuz i don't wanna see it on blogspot :)
ha...too late
he has a girlfriend so we used my stuffed animals to pretend to have sex
All I seem to do lately is get myself off, take naked pictures and drink beer. I don't know if thats a good or bad thing.
but the lizard people decide everything anyway
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
this is going to sound stupid but when I was drunk and thought I was a stripper where I did toss my pants?
Is this the girl that wrote "Poon Slayer" across my chest?!
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
So we came to a decision, you need to fuck your hot roommate and send us pictures. We voted, so don't hate the democracy this great country stands for
So his 25th anniversary post of love to his wife was almost verbatim what he said to me last week. Does that mean I win or lose?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Why are we so great
Like I'm def going to a therapist but I wouldn't change a thing about us except maybe the peeing
I'm so sad at the lack of dick in my life I am going to get sauced and make rice krispy treats
random boy in my bed. last night wasnt a dream. fuck.
I'm not drunk or hungover and I don't have to work. My body is sooo confused!
So, I almost went hone with a French guy and a drag queen. Together. Then I became sober enough to realize, that's not my style.
You now have a new job. Call me around 1pm everyday and make sure I've eaten something. All I've had today is dick and cheesecake.
Randomize