i would punch a child for taco bell
Aren't I supposed to sit on your face?
There's a girl in here wearing a kaballah bracelet and a miley Cyrus tshirt. consider her judged.
Found you in the bushes with fireworks, a teacup and no shoes. Decided it was a bad time to wake you.
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
it's been dubbed the summer of antibiotics
I don't think eating half of a pickle out of my mouth counts as getting to know me
I like to keep a steady black out going for the holidays. I feel it makes me less cynical
He took a girl home tonight that he was trying to sell a fridge to. She wanted a fridge and got his dick. He's got a talent.
THIS IS NO TIME FOR SHAME JOSH. JUST GOTTA GET IT IN. PURELY FOR LEVELING UP PURPOSES
Goldenshlager is a hell of a drink. And these are the adventures ur missing out on w me. I gave someone a bath Emily. A BATH.
Awkward
Can't say I wouldn't let it happen again.
I had a sex with someone last night and I was so drunk. i told him to tell me his whole name so I can say it back to him in a "sexy" way.... Because I forgot it
Its my nipple ring piercing anniversary. We need to celebrate.
i cant hook up i'm covered in egg rolls
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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