Be careful down there, Shane may have pooped on the carpet.
It is obvious to me now why clam chowder & beer aren't a good combo.
it was all downhill after the free blackjack taco
there's only 1 girl at Mount St Mary that's a virgin. the Mary statue standing outside
I finally got her to squirt but it wasnt a stream, it came out in the form of mist. I felt like I was in rainforest cafe.
i'm glad we're now at the level of friendship where we can comfortably discuss the quality of our shit
It was cool in an 'oh shit I'm gonna get arrested' way.
My nipple ring got caught on the rug again. Tequila makes me unlearn these things
knew it was a bad idea. the look she gave me when i left her roommates bedroom in the morning really illustrated that.
I think people like me is why alcohol became illegal at one point
He got cut off by the bartender. So he kept buying people drinks of they would i get him a drink. Before you know it him and 8 people were outside the bat trying to get people. To by them drinks
I just rolled a blunt and took my bra off. I'm not going anywhere.
I apologize in advance for the amount of cleavage I'll be exposing your boyfriend to.
I just had sex in the footy bunny pajamas my mom bought me for christmas. Tis the season
Hi. Tara tells me your sandwiches and stamina are substantial
Randomize
