You're so easy to please, it's adorable. Like an alcoholic puppy.
sooo my mom just yelled up the stairs " you left your bowl down by the computer"....aaand for a second I forgot cereal bowls still existed
She bought a fucking hedgehog. And that's just the tip of the crazy iceberg.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
It was actually pretty good. His cock is as fat as the rest of him and I took out my contacts so I couldn't see him clearly.
Think I just saw your homeless guy on High Street. Did you give him back his crutch?
I feel like a blind man at a water park. Every step has the potential to be either fatal or lead to accidental, but totally enjoyable, sex.
I just farted and its sounded like it was disappointed in me.
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
No dude. I can't think of anything LESS sexy than yodeling
I think you are severely overestimating being able to get your lingerie back by posting the lyrics of Irreplaceable
The fabulous human disaster: it is him
decided to jump from one of the levels of the Westin chicago Nortghwest. it was worth the broken legs.
I'm going to target high, just in case I ask you where my paycheck went later
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