...is it true? will i see you next weekend
ah, i can't wait till there's negative 2 inches between us
all I know is if I don't watch spice world right now there will be a firefight.
I just feng shui'd our living room furniture. You may be mad in the morning
I just drove by a church. On the sign out front was written 'crocodile cock'. On both sides.
Satisfying Perfect Camera Moments
You should get a handy in the street again, just to prove you've still got it.
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
We haven't said piping hot jizz in awhile... that needs to come back into our conversations
Wtf just happened. Thought you were in my bed since 3am, turned out I was sharing it w/a drunk girl from the 6th floor lounge...
This Dog Travel Carrier is a Must
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
She's currently doing somersaults across the kitchen floor without underwear on. We may not make it to the bar.
He isn't understanding any of my Fetty Wap references. He may not be a keeper after all.
I made out with 4 out of 4 girls I was out with last night, I'm pretty sure everyone knows I'm a lesbian by now