This fat girl in front of me just got on the bus to go 2 blocks. Do you think she ever wonders why shes fat?
i have absolutely no control over my now miserable and whore-ish lifestyle.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
ive never been actively dumping during the pledge of allegiance before today...
its always fun the next morning to look around the room and see where all the clothing landed.
He's very warm and cuddly, that's my favorite thing about him. Besides his Porche. And his hot brother.
the recent google searches were "were can i buy a porn horse, why does my heart hurt after drinking, and orlando's teen night..." your thought process perplexes me
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
Fool me once shame on you. Fool me twice and I'm the idiot missing half an eyebrow again.
I wanna get high and watch Shrek tonight...don't make me do it alone.
If he thinks I'm canceling my orgy to coddle his stupid fucking behavior, he has another thing coming
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
I can't believe the MLB is making the NHL look good.
Randomize
