Did u know that at any givin time there r 46,948,952 drunk people in the world? Were not alone
.....then i was kicked out of my work christmas party......
there should be laws that require people like to me to be on birth control.
Cool, so I just walked in on my grandfather checking his prostate in the kitchen.
I swear this girl is like a Cross between Danny Devito and Anne Heche....the Lesbian Years.
Changed it back. Somehow I didn't think my profile pic should be me shirtless on ecstasy, ya know?
I've awoken at 3am again, in a night terror, just thinking about how big his dick was.
just letting you know that jen either: wasn't feeling well and ate grass to make herself throw up or threw up because she's stupid and ate grass
His dad asked what he was doing so he texted his FATHER a picture of me wearing his shirt in his bed.
I'm buying groceries with adderoll. I hope I'm never this broke again.
I got drunk by myself and ended up listening to Beethoven in the dark.
You sent me a naked picture of you as a child? How is that normal
Just saw my ex AGAIN. The constellation of gays must be at some sort of weird point with Mercury.
Don't ask but i need a priest, a calzone, a litre of gravy, and exactly 7 oreos
And a bag of nachos
It was like Strip poker and blow, but with Yu-Gi-Oh cards
Randomize
