I mean don't get me wrong, vaginas are terrifying, they look so sneaky with all their layers and secret compartments and trap doors
North Korea, Best Korea!
Haha so you are never gonna want to meet my mom now...she just found your thong in her front seat
There was no way out of it, seeing as I left my photo ID right next to the vomit.
For the record, chili cheese fritos are not a chaser.
Trust me. My penis has made more than enough decisions this weekend.
Fire alarms went off at reception of gay wedding im at. We all had to evacuate until FD got here. Then...ill just text the photos.
I hope one day I make out with someone in a taco truck :(
I'm glad I inspire you to reach for the stars
Or a taco
OHMYGOD I LITERALLY JUST FINISHED JERKING OFF AND MY MOM BUSTS IN AND HANDS ME A BABY WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON IN MY HOUSE JESUS H CHRIST!
You gave him that scrunchie you made and called it your "sex offering".
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
She had a baby Jesus butt plug
just the thought of you slurpin down noodles really rustles my jimmy
you suck at sexting
Just woke up beside some twink in a kilt.. how is your sunday going
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