Doo rag and shades in the bar. You are missing your future husband.
I'm drunk. And at a vegan cafe. You would hate it. Don't tell my hipster friend but I kinda hate it too.
Yep just saw a license plate that read "taint 2" which implies there is a "taint 1". Only in Florida
He's really hot. I think he's gonna be my reason to shave this winter.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
yeah its nbd she just bit me in the face. be there soon
Cause a man that looks THAT good must have an ass that tastes like lucky charms
Just sent my cousin to buy me a new bra cause mine is zip tied to a bar in the middle of nowhere Iowa
I AM OFFERING YOU ALCOHOL AND THE CHANCE TO LET ME SAY FUCK IT TO MY RESPONSIBILITIES. HOW MANY TIMES DOES THIS HAPPEN?!
I asked him why the bed was wet and got.."well there are two options... and its not you."
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So many gingers... It's like a beacon went out that said "this one is ok with red hair"
Fun fact: drinking me now steals weaponry
Now in just stoned listening to my dads philosophical idea about public transit
We can't go out this weekend. My uterus is so desperate it's given me permanent beer goggles
Sometimes having a penis is like having a really stupid drunk best friend. You see it doing dumb shit but you're just not the one in charge.
For a girl who cried from fear the last time she was asked out, this. Is. TERRIFYING!
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